I was away for a week recently. When I got home, Baxter was so happy to see me he wouldn’t let me out of his sight. He followed me wherever I went, and he would either meow for attention or just lie down and stare. I think he missed me, and he wasn’t about to let me forget it. He craved my attention, and he wanted to be cuddled, scratched and petted to assure him I was close again.
When Baxter was younger and I would leave for a while, he had a different attitude about my return. At first, he would greet me and want to be close, but after those formalities, he would give me the cold shoulder for a few days, sitting with his back to me, staying out of reach for a pat or scratch, and even trying to bite me when I wasn’t looking. He was angry, and he wasn’t going to let me off the hook for abandoning him. He wouldn’t forget the loneliness of my absence.
What has caused the change in Baxter’s attitude and behavior? Age. As he has become a senior cat, Baxter has mellowed about the things that used to upset him. He more often goes along with my antics rather than resist them. He looks to what he has set before him now, rather than what he missed or lost. He is grateful for a good life.
We need to learn this feline wisdom for our own lives. As the years pass, we can get stuck by focusing on the wrong things. We think of our regrets and mishaps--what opportunities we missed, what we did wrong, how others mistreated us—and we get trapped in this negative spiral. We can so concentrate on what we have lost—health, a work position, loved ones—that we can’t see what we still have--the good we have done, others who have helped us and contributed to our success and well-being, faithful friends and family. We fail to see the blessings we have, and so we wallow in anger over what we lost or never had. How do we learn to be grateful for what remains and how it has increased in value over the years?
The Eucharist is about gratitude for the blessings we bear in life. We are encouraged by the Church to participate regularly. This isn’t just a rule to keep the collection basket full. It’s a habit that is meant to foster our mature gratitude over time and deepen it, finding its roots in the relationshipsthat shape our lives rather than the things we have earned and possess. Our relationship with God permeates all our other relationships, and it is the source for our gratitude. As it unfolds in the mystery of death and resurrection Jesus revealed to us, we recreate our personal stories to see in them the saving love of God at work for us. The negative experiences are mellowed by grace to teach us how to release our anger and grow our sense of goodness because God loves us always in every condition. These lessons come with age. May we embrace the wisdom that our lives hold. Like Baxter, may we all grow old gracefully.
-Monsignor Statnick
